I hate the way my body looks. I used to say this to myself all the time, and it was really really really discouraging. I was my own worst enemy. I would tell myself: “You’re bad, you’re gross, you look terrible.”
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I Used To Hate My Body So Much I Would Buy Outfits Without Trying Them On
I would go to the store and buy an outfit, without even trying it on, because I hated dressing rooms. I hated being forced to look at my body in a full length mirror. Every time I would even go in a dressing room I would immediately start to sweat and stress over the fact that I hadn’t seen my body in a mirror in so long. I hated trying to squeeze into a pair of jeans, with my belly overhanging on top of them. I was disgusted with myself, and did not like myself at all.
So, instead of doing that, I started to just buy outfits right off the mannequin and go home without trying them on. At first, I would be excited, thinking about the outfit and how cute it looked when I bought it. But as soon as I would get home and actually try it on, I HATED IT! I hated the way my body looked in it.
So, I would just take the outfit off and go back to my baggy sweatpants, and baggy T-shirt. I would hide my body so no one could tell how much weight I had gained. I had gained so much weight so fast, that I would look at myself and immediately think: “I can’t believe you let yourself gain so much weight, and get to this point. You look disgusting now. I can’t believe you let yourself get out of the house. You’re never going to look cute in these outfits. They’re never going to look good on you. You’re always going to have to wear these baggy pants. You’re never going to be able to wear what other people are wearing.”
I just HATED my body.
One Day, As I Was Looking At Myself In The Mirror…
But, one day, as I was looking at myself in the mirror, with tears running down my face, I realized the things that I say to myself are the things that I believe about myself. So, I starting thinking: “What would happen if I would start telling myself some kind words? What would happen if I would tell myself that I am amazing; that I look beautiful; and that I am confident? What would that do? How would that shift my mindset?”
Obviously, at first, I did not believe it. So, I had to force it upon myself. I went and got myself a dry-erase marker, then I started to write phrases on my mirror. I made sure it was the mirror I was using to get ready every single day. I wrote things like:
- I love my body
- I am losing weight
- I am confident
- I am beautiful
- I am gorgeous
- I am extremely smart
- I can do anything
- I am courageous
I kept writing nice statements to myself everyday in the hopes of taking over the negative side of my brain, and replacing those negative thoughts about myself. Kind of like a brain detox.
I would read those statements every time I looked at myself in the mirror. As soon as I would catch myself saying something negative about myself, I would repeat the list in my head.
Even if I couldn’t believe the statements at first, when I would repeat them in my head, I could feel the energy shift inside my body, and I could feel my brain start being receptive to them. It’s like my brain and my body were so thirsty for compliments from myself. My brain was like a sponge, just absorbing all of the statements.
So the first thing you can do to shift from self-hate and self-loath, to self-love and self-appreciation is repeating positive statements to yourself everyday, even if you don’t believe them.
You can’t tell yourself negative things every day, and expect your body to get up and go do positive things. You can’t think negative thoughts about yourself, and expect your body to go do positive food choices, or want to workout, or let go of its body fat. It’s just impossible.
You need to start feeding your mind with positive things. Even if you don’t believe it yet, it will be enough for your body to absorb it and start acting differently. Your body will start to keep its energy, and start making healthier choices. And if your repeat it every day, you will start to believe it, trust me.
I Never Thought In A Million Years…
I never thought in a million years, that I could make the shift from who I was back then and how I used to perceive myself, to being super happy and maintaining a healthy weight for over 6 years. I never thought I could be confident inside my body, no matter what stage my body is. Now, I can range from being ripped in the summer, to being 10 lbs over my ideal weight around Christmas time, but I love my body through all of those stages now.
It starts with a marker, your mirror and the list of positive statements about yourself.
If you need help with this part, I actually made you a free kickstart plan that walks you through creating a goal, and gives you a step-by-step instruction manual on how to love yourself again and treat yourself better.
This will help you move forward in your weightloss journey, because no matter what weightloss plan you’re on. You won’t stick to it unless you love yourself, and stop self-sabotaging your body. The nicer you are to yourself and your body, the better you will perform.
Read my next post if You’re Tired Of Yo-Yo Dieting
With LOVE, always